Monday, 21 February 2011

Bloggers in politics

We the middle class endure so much of corruption in our day to day life. Yes, we do pay bribes at times but the only noble intention behind that is to ensure that we don’t have to wait to meet our requirements. We do speak up against corruption as we have been doing against the mega scams in the country. We do so much of back scratching in each others blog on these issues.

As it is the case there are some people in our midst who are not happy with this and snigger at us as "paper err blog tigers". One of them went to the extent of daring us to form a political party. That is that, to give a suitable reply to these "Blog Sledgers", it has been decided to form the BlOOP (Bloggers Only Operating Party).

I, Me and My-self held a discussion in this regard to decide on the symbol, goals, alliance partners, fund raising, etc. Since we held a lengthy discussion in this regard, all of it will be said in many parts.

Here is an introduction of the three founding members of BlOOP.

I is only worried about how to maximize benefits for myself and family. I knows very little on how a country is to be run.

Me survives for I. Me is a honest payer thanks only to TDS. Me never insisted on bills in the pre VAT era because that meant reduced prices.

My-self is an idealist but wont mind compromising on anything which will hurt Me. My-self believes that ranting alone will cure the country of corruption.
Despite the best efforts of I, Me and Myself, their conscience also came for the meeting. They are called I-con, Me-con and Myself-con (please don’t read between the lines).

The meeting began with I talking "Ok, guys we have come together to form the BlOOP and this should silence that Blog Sledger keeps on calling us as CRIB (Cowards Raging in Blogs).

Me: Forget that PIA who is HSC.

Myself: I somehow doubted that he is a Paki but never knew that he works for Pakistan International Airlines. That he would have not studied beyond Higher Secondary School is quite evident from the poor English in his blogs".

Me "No I meant he is a Pain in the Arse who is Highly Supportive of Corruption"

I "ok, ok, let us not lose track of our goals, hope that PIA does not get wind of our meeting. We are here to change the nation. We have to decide on the party symbol, goals, getting members, publicity and raising party funds, escape route, etc"

Me " We all have come with our conscience and once in a while that SOB will talk up"

Myself "You mean Son of ………."

Me "Wrong again, Straight Offensive Bugger"
I "As the Party Symbol for BlOOP, I propose a Vuvuzela made from plastic

(I-Con speaks up – So apt! that is what most of your creative and expressive blogs are pure plastic)

Myself "But that makes a lot of noise without substance and is considered a nuisance."

(Myself-Con speaks up – What do you think all your current affair blogs are about?)

Me:- i support I. We can save a lot of expenses as we would get enough publicity from the ongoing worldcup. Like our rage, we will keep it on paper, so nobody can take action against us for using it in reality.

(Me-Con speaks up – Are you Me or Meow?)

I – let us get down to business, after this meeting, i have to go to the outskirts of the city, where we are forming a new layout on a farmland.

(I-Con speaks up – Good on you! You will form layouts on farmlands for your investment and later rant about rising food and vegetable prices).

Me – Ok let us form the goals, Myself is good at it, so he will take over.
Myself - To begin with I propose abolition of all types of subsidies for both middle class and the poor people. I also propose doing away with tax deductions. Henceforth, in our idealistic world no losses to the exchequer"

Me – "Damn the exchequer. Who is he, just a fictitious person? I cannot pay more for my gas cylinder, mobile phone, SUV fuel, etc. What should I do with all those insurance policies? You should stop subsidies for the poor guys not the middle class. Change the economic policy or I will write a severe blog against this BlOOP. "

I – i agree with Me. Infact I am fed up with this tag of "honest tax payer". Scrap that TDS in our economic policy

Myself – Ok, ok, let us keep the economic agenda on the backburner

(My con speaks up- he, he, it means you are going to follow others)

Myself:- Now let us focus on the Education policy. I propose that school/college fees be collected at prescribed limits with no donations at all. Poor people will be reserved 25% seats in premium schools"

I – This is not acceptable. i cannot see my daughter sharing the class with a construction labours son. Strike it off now! You don’t know the middle class, they will question your intelligence and lynch you in their blogs, when you are in some other capacity"

Me " my daughters school wont tolerate me being part of any association that limits their right to collect the fees and donation they want. I have paid a lot of money to get her admitted into that school. Delete this condition or i walk out"

Myself "ok, I have to catch up with the world cup opening ceremony, rework on the goals and come back to you"

As all three walk out, I-Con, Me-Con and Myself-Con sing

"Ring a Ring a Roses
Guys with full of empty poses.
Ask them for actions
They reveal true colors.

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Banglaore, Karnataka, India